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[sticky post] About Me

BASICS

THE BIG STUFF
Dezi
30 Dec 1985
USA
French teacher
German-American

INTERESTS
Feminism
Foreign Languages
Queer/LGBT Issues
Sports
Politics

HOBBIES
Movies
Travelling
Tennis
Football/Soccer

SORTING/TESTS/IDENTIFIERS
Slytherin/Ravenclaw (Slytherclaw ftw)
Capricorn
INFP
Enneagram type 7: the enthusiast
Gender= Femme-ish.
Sexuality= Pansexual...celibate? It's complicated.

FAVORITES

FANDOMS
Harry Potter
The Lord of the Rings
Supernatural-ish (stopped watching after season 8, RPF)
Vikings (RPF)

SHIPS
Harry/Ron/Hermione (threesomes ftw, HP)
Jensen Ackles/Misha Collins (SPN RPF)
Athelstan/Ragnar (Vikings)
Athlestan/Floki/Helga (pre season 3)
George Blagden/Travis Fimmel (Vikings RPF)
George Blagden/Gustaf Skarsgard (Vikings RPF)

BOOKS/AUTHORS
The Great Gatsby by F Scott Fitzgerald
The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings trilogy by JRR Tolkien
the Harry Potter books by JK Rowling
I Capture the Castle by Dodie Smith
John Le Carre
Agatha Christie
Ngaio Marsh

MOVIES
The Lord of the Rings trilogy
Dogma
Snatch
The Losers
GoldenEye
all Daniel Craig James Bond films
The Brothers Bloom
Argo

TELEVISION SERIES
Vikings
Game of Thrones
Breaking Bad
Wallander
Come Dine with Me

ARTISTS/BANDS
Fall Out Boy
Arctic Monkeys
The Doors
Mumford & Sons
Adele
Hozier
Shakira

MUSIC GENRES
Alternative Rock & Rock
Indie
Post-Rock
Pop

SPORTS
Tennis
Football (soccer)

SPORTS TEAMS
Bayern-München(football)
Sheffield United (football)
Olympique Lyonnais (football)
Die Deutsche Fußballnationalmannschaft (The German national football team)
JFA Mens & Women's (Japan Football Association)
Selección de fútbol de Argentina (Argentina's national football team)

ATHLETES
literally anyone who has played in the fussball-bund for Germany
Roger Federer

FOODS
Asian cuisines, especially Japanese and Chinese
breakfast foods
berries

DRINKS
Hot tea
White wine
Sparkling/mineral waters

MISC
Twitter: @snuggledeath
Tumblr: mazeballet
Instagram: themazeballet

I never have anything to say

So it's been a very long time since my last update. Nothing new to report. I continue to be single and lonely, with no real friendships except one or two very close ones. I have some big plans for next summer (that I will probably detail in a separate post) and I've lost some weight and overall, life isn't unbearable. Except when it is.

I do read you all everyday even though I rarely comment. Sorry that I'm always so quiet.

Zed

So we have come to the end of the great blogging experiment. I am a terrible blogger. Of course, this month has hit me with the worst news ever: that I will not have a job at the end of the year. So I've been very maudlin. I still have no idea where my life will be heading or what I'll be doing this time next year. I have some options, but nothing really concrete.

I shall see. We shall see. Thanks for your visits, for those of you who visited. I would love to do this again, actually. It really helped me focus.

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Yes

a series of haikus

i want to say yes
to so many diff'rent things
but can only wait

yes is a word i
very rarely get to say:
dare i dream today?

this month has been hard
so many dreams deferred and
so many tears shed

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Xenophobia

What is xenophobia, really
but an irrational desire
to claim the only true life
is your own?

What is it, really, but
never leaving your house
never leaving your land
and insisting that the way
you see life is the way it is?

And when 'they' finally come
your vision is destroyed
but not before you destroy them
first.

Waiting and Wednesdays

Tomorrow is another job interview. It's not the job I want but I do need work. I wish the other job would call me. I want it so badly. I've called them a few times but I don't need to bother them.

I've taken a sick day on Wednesday. I'm getting so tired and my students are so awful. I miss my students last year. Oh well. Nostalgia, really.

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Variations on a Theme

If I could sum up my life so far in one word, it would be: disappointing. Disappointment? Disillusionment? I have not had a single good thing happen in my life ever. There have been happy 'moments' in my life, but in general the overall trajectory of my life has been a series of stupid mistakes, bad decisions, and failure. I guess I was never meant to amount to anything, anyway.

Unique

As an only child, I am the only combination of my parents that there will ever be. My parents are also divorced so there is definitely nobody that will ever be like me. I feel like somehow this is important, but there are so many other only children in this world that I'm unsure why I should feel special.

I don't understand siblings. They've always mystified me. Their relationships are forced by the mere fact of being related to one another and nothing else. But it must be very nice to have someone to contact other than your parents when something has gone wrong...but only if your relationship has survived the travails of life.

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Travel

I've been travelling my entire life. I've visited every continent except Antarctica. I would love to visit one day but I'm also aware of the ecological impact of too many tourists to fragile ecosystems like Antarctica.

My favourite places to live/travel are definitely all in Europe. I love France and I LOVE London, but I also love The Netherlands. I'm learning Swedish because I would love to go and just be able to chat in Swedish with people.

I think my love of travel and my love of language is intertwined. I see much more of a country when I've learned the language. It's one of the reasons I've learned so many and want to learn more.

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